


Fixing what is broken

by Deadmeka



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Family, Gen, Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-05
Updated: 2017-08-05
Packaged: 2018-12-11 15:34:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,832
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11717292
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Deadmeka/pseuds/Deadmeka
Summary: Alternative title by my good friend Ray: Daddy IssuesMerle introduces his kids to Magnus and Taako, and ends up questioning his own dadbilities.Also Angus is a good good boy and I love him





	Fixing what is broken

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first ever Actual Proper Fanfic, I've only written a handful of OC drabbles before, so please go easy on me \o/

When Merle had finally told Magnus and Taako about his kids, they had reacted with a mix of disbelief and great cheeriness. They had laughed and laughed and when the laughter had run out and they finally realized he was completely serious, they turned to gawking instead. Merle had joked along, as he always did, but that night while brushing his teeth before bed he took a moment to really study his own face in the mirror.  
The fluorescent lights up ahead flickered slightly, along with the apprehension inside.  
Was it really so hard to believe he could be a dad? Stroking a hand along his wiry beard he stood up straight, tried to see his own dad in himself. He had the wrinkles alright, and the nose, and if he squinted real hard he could see the same steely glint in there. But Merle knew all too well that fatherhood lay in more than appearances.  
With a huff, he spat into the sink and slammed the toothbrush into its mug, making mug and toothbrush alike clatter into the sink. He stared at them for a second before turning and leaving.  
Whatever. He'd fix it tomorrow.

When Magnus approached him the next day and asked if he would get to meet Merle’s kids anytime soon, Merle had been hesitant at best. It had taken a lot of courage to even tell them about the children in the first place, and he didn't know if he was ready for face to face introductions. His fatherhood had been such a closely guarded secret for so long it was hard to let go of those final inhibitions. And while telling the other Tres Horny Boys about the existence of kids was one thing, it was a whole other thing to have the bumpy past of Merle's relationship with Mookie and Mavis completely exposed, laid bare for all to see.  
But the question kept popping up, and in the end he gave in. Mookie would be thrilled to meet someone like Magnus, and while Mavis most likely wouldn't be as interested she would surely tolerate it for the sake of her younger brother.  
They agreed to meet up the following weekend, in one of the great big parks in Neverwinter. 

On that following Sunday, the Highchurch family had only been waiting for about 10 minutes in the sunlight when Merle could hear his name being called in a familiar voice. He looked up and found to his surprise that Magnus had not come alone. Taako was being towed along, seemingly against his will. The heavy feeling in Merle's stomach grew even heavier as he watched the two approach, Magnus windmilling his arm in an overly excited wave. As they drew closer he could hear a steady grumbling coming from the way of the wizard, but it was all but ignored by the fighter, who stopped in front of them with a grin from ear to ear.  
Mookie had been watching them approach with a look of curiosity on his face, and when he spotted Railsplitter he shot up and ran around Magnus’ legs, eyeing his equipment.  
“Is that a real battleaxe? Like for real? It’s so huge!”  
He rambled on and on, and Magnus ruffled the energetic dwarven boys hair with a little laugh.  
“Yeah, it’s real alright! It’s super badass and also can fell any tree in one chop.”  
At this, Mookie stared at him with awe, and Merle butted in.  
“Now, now, Mookie, calm down, it’s just an axe.” Merle looked up at Magnus and continued with a slight frown. “Didnt’ya think it would be a bit inappropriate to bring your axe? It’s just a small park excursion.”  
Mavis squinted at her father and pointed to his back, where he too carried a weapon.  
“Dad, you literally have your huge hammer with you right now. It’s right there. You always bring it.”  
Not having a good explanation for that, he floundered for a second before Magnus laughed and patted him on the shoulder.  
“Don't worry dude, I’ll make sure Mookie doesn’t hurt himself on it. Because that’s who this little guy is right?”  
By then Mookie had shifted his attention to Taako, who looked deeply uncomfortable.  
“Shoo. Go away. No closer, no, nono, no-” he tried, but it was too late as Mookie had grabbed onto Taako’s robes and was literally climbing him like a tree. Mavis rolled her eyes and went to pick him up, but before she had time to, Taako had waved his wand down at the boy, making him gently float up into the air and land in the grass a few meters away. Unknowingly he had created the world's best game, because by now Mookie was giggling uncontrollably, and immediately running back to cling to the elf again, hoping for the same effect. With the boy distracted, Mavis and Merle turned their attention to Magnus.  
“Soooo. This here is Mavis, who I told you about. She's my eldest.”  
With a small curtsy, the dwarven girl smiled politely. “Magnus I assume. I've heard a lot about you and Taako over there.”  
Magnus replied with a polite nod of his own. “And I’ve not heard nearly enough about you! Merle only told us about a week ago, I could hardly believe it when he first told me. But I’m glad to be making your acquaintance now.”  
Mavis gave her dad a small quizzical look, and Merle made a small noncommittal gesture, trying to convey something along the lines of ‘we’ll talk about it later’. She turned her attention back to Magnus, who looked slightly lost.  
“Well I suppose you are usually too busy adventuring to talk about family. It sounds very dangerous but at least Merle is along. He’s talked a lot about how busy he is saving you guys all the time.”  
Magnus looked at her in disbelief. “He’s said what now? Merle? Merle Highchurch.” The fighter looked at Merle and guffaws. By then Taako had become thoroughly tired of being constantly climbed by Mookie, and he quickly makes his way over, a smug smile creeping onto his lips. “Waitwaitwait. Merle said what. He told you he saves us? Did he also say hes super good at battles and shit?” At this point he doubles over and wheezes with laughter. The look Mavis gives her father makes him wish the earth would swallow him whole on the spot. She quickly turns back to Magnus and Taako who have managed to catch their breath.  
“Yeah, he did say that actually. Maybe you can tell me more about what your adventures are _actually_ like.” 

The shame felt like cold water slowly running down Merle’s neck. “Forgot I told you that-” he mumbles, but he was all but forgotten as Taako and Magnus were happily chatting about Merle's misadventures to Mavis and no one actually payed any attention to his words. Mookie listened reverently to their every tale, for once sitting still.  
After a while he got fidgety, and convinced Magnus to carry him high in the air, being so tall n’ all. Merle watched them and tried to interject occasionally as Taako continued to smugly speak to Mavis.  
Eventually Merle gave up and instead focused on the frayed hem of his sleeve. He picked at it grumpily, and soon enough he was left with a mess of threads, impossible to smooth over. He couldn’t help but feel like it did a bit too good of a job describing his current situation. When he looked up again he realized that Taako had started doing little magic demonstrations for Mavis, soaking up the attention, and when she realized he was The Taako, Taako from TV, he looked as though he might explode from the self-satisfaction.  
He watched the scene unfold in silence. Magnus was happily playing with the young boy, and Mavis was giggling at Taako’s quips. The sun was shining and the grass looked soft to the touch. But he didn’t feel like touching it, and the sun didn't quite warm his skin.  
Today was a disaster.  
Slowly, the shame and guilt and self pity turned to something akin to anger, and he closed his fists tightly, hard enough to make little crescent imprints in the palms of his hands. He stood up suddenly, and glared at Taako and Mavis, the wizard faltering for a second as he saw the way his co-adventurer looked at them.  
“Mavis. We’re going home now.” He barked at her, frustration making his tone harsher than he intended. Mavis turned to look at him and pressed her lips hard together, but Merle couldn't tell if she was sad or angry. Yet another of his failings as a father he supposed.  
“I’d like to stay here a while if that's okay dad.” She bit back, her tone icy.  
“Fine!” He spat, turning his attention to Mookie.”Mookie! We’re going home. Get over here right now.”  
Mookie looked stopped his playing and turned to look at Merle, a large pout on his face.  
“Aww but daddy I’m having so much funnnnnnn” He whined, and by then Merle had no energy left to argue. “Bring Mookie home when you go Mavis,” he grumbled and he turned to start making his way back to the Bureau of Balance.

By the time he found himself in his room, he gathered all the blankets and pillows he could find, and then buried himself in them on the bed. It wasn’t too hard, and before long all that could be seen of him was a stray tuft of beard sticking out from under a blanket.  
_Nothing like bringing the family together, huh._ He rubbed at his face and wondered what he’d done to deserve this. Of course he did know the answer, but it was much nicer to try and forget that.  
After a while he could hear a soft knocking on the door. He didn’t answer, but the knocking persisted, and he groaned at it. The door opened carefully, and a young voice called out to him. “Merle?” Angus stepped into the room, closing the door gently behind him.  
“I’m not home,” Merle replied from under the blankets. “I’m on vacation. Come back next year.”  
Angus sighed a little. “I know you’re not away Sir, I can see your beard right there. It’s sticking out.” He walked over, and as if to prove a point, poked at the stray beard tuft until it too was concealed in the dwarf’s blanket nest. “There. All hidden Sir.”  
“Thanks Ango.” Merle sighed, and when Angus was just about to say something there came a croaky whisper from the pile.  
“Am I a bad person, kid? Like a properly bad person?”  
A drawn out silence filled the room. When Merle thought he might just die right then and there, Angus spoke, slowly, as though he was picking every word carefully.  
“No Sir, I don’t think you are. I’ve seen lots of bad people even if I’m young, and you’re not one of them.” Merle thought about this for a second, rubbing his cheek as he spoke.  
“Remember when you met my kids? I told you I’d been a crappy dad and an even crappier husband. After today I think I might even be the crappiest dad and the crappiest husband that has ever lived.” He licked his chapped lips and tried really hard not to cry.  
“Hey now Sir, that’s not true. I’m pretty sure you messed up real bad in the past, and maybe today too, but what’s most important is that you own up to it and apologize and move on instead of running away again.”  
By now Merle was really crying, and Angus politely pretended not to hear the sniffling coming from the blanket nest.  
“How does it come so easily to them though? The kids had so much fun today, I’ve never gotten Mavis to laugh like that, shes always so disappointed in me. How are they much better at the dad thing than I am without even trying?”  
At this Angus stifled a small laugh.  
“Sir could you literally _imagine_ Taako as a dad? He wouldn’t last 5 minutes, he can barely handle me. And Magnus would end up like, strapping a sword to his child and wielding it in battle. Besides, I think the point is that they’re not actually trying. They've never been dads and I'm pretty sure it involves more than just playing with your kids or cracking dumb jokes. You are trying though. You being like this right now kinda proves you care a lot.”  
Merle sniffled loudly and poked his face out of the blanket pile. “Y’think so kid?”  
Angus nods. “ I do, though, you should probably go apologize to your kids before you soak even more of those poor poor blankets with snot and tears.”  
Merle nodded and sat up, rubbing his eyes with the back of his hand.  
Angus gave him a small smile before scurrying out the door, a quick “Goodbye Sir!” as he disappeared around the corner. Slowly getting off the bed, Merle tried to smooth his beard down but did not make much of a difference. 

When he stepped out the door to his dorm he froze. On the other side of the corridor, sat leaning against the wall was Mavis, Mookie sleeping draped over her legs.  
She watched her father carefully as he stepped out onto the linoleum floor.  
“H-hi Mavis. Did’ya have fun today with Magnus and Taako?”  
“Yeah it was nice. I think Magnus might need a vacation after all the running around he did with Mookie. They dropped us off here to see you a little while ago.”  
An awkward silence settled as she watched him, lips pressed together slightly.  
Merle looked down, studying his frayed sleeve. “Hey Mavis. I don’t know how much you heard from earlier when I was talking to Angus, but I, uh. Really gotta apologize. For everything. I’m sorry I wasn’t around when you were small, and I'm sorry I wasn't around much later either. I shouldn't have lied about being all those great things, but I just wanted you to think I was cool, as though that could somehow make up for all those years I spent being the crappiest dad imaginable.” Merle went back to picking at his sleeve, not daring to look his daughter in the eye. She sighed deeply.  
“It just... Kinda stung to find out you hadn't even mentioned us to your coworkers, who you spend literally all your time with. I worry a lot that the reason you don’t spend more time with us is because compared to your grand adventures we’re just not interesting enough.”  
As Merle looked up at her while she spoke, he realized she too was picking at her sleeve.  
He bit his lip and crossed the short distance, plopping down next to his kids with a sigh.  
“I haven’t kept you a secret because I’m not proud of you, that’s not it at all. I just- I’ve been so ashamed of the way I’ve been, of myself, and I didn’t want them to know what a shitt- I mean what a terrible dad I was. I’m trying really hard to be a good dad to you and Mookie now, and that’s because I’m really proud of ya. You’re better than I’ve ever been, and probably better than I’ll ever be in the future too.” 

Merle held his hand out tentatively, and when he could feel Mavis’ warm little hand take his he could feel the tears welling up again.  
“Thank you dad. I do think you’re pretty cool sometimes. Though... Did you really lose your arm because you were told by the Grim Reaper to grab a crystal you knew would mess you up?” Merle laughed embarassedly at this and rubbed the back of his neck.  
“Yeah no, about that one. Y’see he pretended he was Pan and I just kinda believed him. So I grabbed the crystal without thinking and the rest is history.”  
Mavis snorted. “Dad, did you know it says gullible in the ceiling here?”  
Merle frowned and looked up, making Mavis stifle a giggle as to not wake Mookie up.  
Before long Merle was giggling too, and once they’d calmed down Mavis carefully leaned over and rested her head against her dad’s shoulder.  
“Hey, I know that example wasn’t the best, and it really is pretty dangerous, but if you ever, uh, decide you changed your mind on that whole Merle and Daughter and Son adventuring team then give your old man a shout. I think you’d be really, really good at it. Unless you already have something else you wanna do when you grow up of course! Anything and I’ll try make that dream work and-” Merle kept floundering until Mavis squeezed his hand gently.  
“I’ll consider the adventuring company. But only if it’ll be called Mavis & Co.”  
Merle laughed and squeezed her hand back.  
“That’s my girl.”

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you liked it!


End file.
